7 Things that the Single Girl wishes her friend in a relationship knew
Remember those days when you and your bestie would spend all day doing movie marathons, shopping at the mall, driving around all day long blasting those favorite tunes, laughing in tears with your inside jokes and taking selfies? Those are the kind of things that make friendship’s last forever…or until one of you get into a relationship. Everything changes, seemingly overnight. While it’s always exciting to hear that our friend has found someone that makes them happy, now everything has changed, and it’s hard. So, while you are going on and on about how this guy has GOT to be “the One,” this is what your Single friends are honestly thinking, but will never tell you.
- Enough already! – We are tired of constantly hearing sentences starting with “my boyfriend and I”, “my boyfriend said”, and “guess what my boyfriend did”. Because after about 5 of those, we don’t care. We would much rather talk about the sales that’s going on at the mall, or the vacation we would like to go on (that you probably are going to find an excuse not to go on so you can be with your boyfriend)
- Your Time Management needs some improvement! – We understand that now you have a man in your life that you can’t get enough of and that is awesome. But your single friend hasn’t seen or heard from you in about 6-8 weeks and you didn’t even notice. No, we don’t expect you to spend every waking moment with us or every weekend hanging out. All we really need is an hour or two of your undivided attention for dinner, shopping, or a drink once or twice a month or so. By the way, while we’re having this quality girl time, it would be great if you didn’t’ spend the whole time texting, calling your man, or sending him selfies. It’s Girl Time!
- You have your own opinion – After a while, you start saying things like “My boyfriend doesn’t like” or “we don’t do that kind of thing anymore”…seriously. “We, we, we…”, when did that happen? Did you forget that you can make your own decisions, without disrespecting your man? While we can understand why you wouldn’t want to do anything to hinder your relationship, you can still be the same person you were before your relationship started, at least with us.
- We aren’t the enemy – Whether you realize it or not, your man probably doesn’t like us for the simple fact that we are your single friend. Your man feels like we are going to convince you to do all the things you used to do before: drinking, getting numbers, going on dates, wearing certain clothes, or maybe he thinks we are going to tell you he sucks and you need to find a new man. That just isn’t the case. Yes, we realize that our lifestyle maybe slightly different than that of someone in a relationship, however we just want to be with our friend. A trip to the mall, a dinner, or a movie doesn’t involve a wild night full of drinking, lude acts or a truck load of men. No, we aren’t trying to take you from your man. A little girl time is all we require.
- We were here before they were- It’s hard to remember what life was like before you were in this relationship, but the fact is, we were a part of that life. Now that things are different, it can hurt. We can’t call you anymore for the stupid stuff, or squeal uncontrollably when our favorite song or movie is on the phone, or laugh at our little inside jokes so easily anymore. Or best friend language, is now foreign and you speak a new language that we don’t recognize with someone that we don’t know. In our deepest of hearts, in that dark corner, he has become our replacement. You have to understand, that takes some getting used to.
- It’s HARD for us to share – While we are on the subject….Conversations are shorter, things aren’t funny anymore, we used to tell each other every little thing going on in our lives, right down to the color of underwear we decided to wear and our choice of 2% over whole milk and now our conversations consist of :“What’s new with you?”
“Nothing much. You?”
“oh okay….Good talk”
You have to understand, this change, seemingly overnight, is confusing, difficult to except and just plain HARD. You feel like you have lost the one person in life that understands you and can be yourself in front of with no judgment. That’s a bond that is hard to find and special to keep. So when it changes, it’s hard to except.
- We miss you – Bottom line. And as your true friend, happiness does not begin to explain what we are for you. You found your diamond in the pile of coal, and the smile you wear is genuine. That’s awesome! As upset we may be, true friendship doesn’t fade away. It may change, but it doesn’t fade away. A real friendship can pick up right where it left off like no time has passed. If this guy doesn’t work out, we’ll be there for you with wine, a large pizza and two pints of Blue Bunny ice cream. But when this guy works out, we’ll still be there, standing next to you, in that ( hopefully not too hideous) dress you picked out for us, handing you that bouquet in that white dress you picked out to promise him forever.
When all is said and done, we will always be your bestie, and this, my dear friend, will never change. We just want to feel as though we will remain an important part of your life, whether you have a relationship or not. There will also come a time when the tables will turn and you will probably be telling us this same exact thing, reminding us that you miss us and our friendship. And that’s okay too. The moral of the story is this: Friendships, real friendships, last forever. Don’t let some guy, whether boyfriend, Fiancé or husband, come between a real friendship. Once in a lifetime friendships are just that…Once in a lifetime. You should never, EVER be without your right hand girl. Your Bestie ❤
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